7 things all successful people outgrow once they hit 40, says psychology

You are currently viewing 7 things all successful people outgrow once they hit 40, says psychology

Age and wisdom often go hand in hand. And when you hit the big 4-0, it’s amazing to see how certain things you once held onto so tightly lose their importance.

According to psychology, there are certain habits and mindsets that successful people tend to outgrow once they hit their forties. I’m going to share seven of those with you today.

In the spirit of learning and growth, here’s a peek into what successful individuals leave behind as they move forward.

Stay tuned to discover if you’re on the path to outgrowing these things too, or if you’ve already managed to shake them off!

1) Chasing approval

As we journey through life, we all want to be acknowledged and appreciated.

A pat on the back or a few words of praise can mean the world to us. We strive for approval – from our peers, our bosses, our families. But as you hit your forties, something shifts.

Successful people tend to outgrow this need for constant validation. They become secure in their own achievements and stop chasing approval from others. They understand that their value is not determined by other people’s opinions.

Successful people learn to change their need for approval into a self-confidence that comes from within.

So, if you’re still seeking approval at every turn, it might be time to reassess. Remember, your worth isn’t determined by what others think of you, but by what you think of yourself.

2) Fear of failure

Ah, failure. It’s something we all dread. I remember a time in my early thirties when I was so scared of failing that it held me back from pursuing my true passions.

I was stuck in a job I didn’t enjoy, too afraid to take the leap and chase my dreams.

7 things narcissists say that seem harmless but are actually deeply manipulative7 things narcissists say that seem harmless but are actually deeply manipulative

But as I crossed the threshold into my forties, something shifted. I realized that every successful person has faced failure at some point in their journey. It’s not a sign of weakness, but rather an opportunity for growth and learning.

Yes, failure can be scary. But it’s also a stepping stone on the path to success. Once you hit 40, you start to understand this, and the fear of failure begins to fade away.

3) The illusion of perfection

Ever caught yourself striving for perfection? It’s an easy trap to fall into. We often feel the need to present a perfect image of ourselves to the world, believing that any flaw or mistake would tarnish our reputation.

As I navigated my thirties, I was constantly chasing this illusion. I’d work late hours, obsess over the smallest details, and drive myself to exhaustion – all in the name of perfection. But then I hit 40, and a realization dawned upon me: Perfection is an illusion.

Renowned psychologist Carl Jung once said, “The most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely.” And he was right. Accepting ourselves, flaws and all, can be terrifying, but it’s also liberating.

Successful people in their forties understand that there’s no such thing as perfect. They embrace their imperfections and use them as stepping stones towards growth. Because the truth is, it’s our imperfections that make us human and unique.

4) Being too busy

In our fast-paced world, being busy is often worn as a badge of honor. We fill our schedules to the brim, believing that the busier we are, the more successful we must be.

I remember in my thirties, my calendar was always overflowing with meetings, deadlines, and commitments. I was constantly on the go, rushing from one task to the next.

But when I hit 40, I realized that being too busy wasn’t a sign of success – it was a barrier.

A study published in the Journal of Applied Psychology supports this shift. It found that people who were constantly busy reported higher levels of stress and lower job satisfaction.

9 things the happiest people do every evening9 things the happiest people do every evening

On the other hand, those who had a more balanced lifestyle reported higher levels of happiness and contentment.

Successful people in their forties understand the importance of balance. They know that while hard work is important, so is taking time for relaxation and self-care. Because success isn’t just about achieving goals – it’s about enjoying the journey along the way.

5) Comparing to others

Comparisons. They’re a part of human nature. We compare ourselves to others – their achievements, their lifestyles, even their Instagram feeds. I remember spending countless hours scrolling through social media, comparing my life to others and feeling inadequate.

But once I hit 40, I realized how unhelpful these comparisons were. They only served to make me feel bad about myself and distracted me from my own path.

Successful people understand this by the time they reach their forties. They recognize that everyone is on their own unique journey and that comparing oneself to others is a futile exercise.

Instead, they focus on their own growth and progress, and let go of the urge to constantly compare themselves to others.

6) The need to always be right

Here’s something counterintuitive. You’d think that being right all the time would be a sign of success, right? Not quite. In fact, as you grow older and wiser, you realize that it’s actually more beneficial to be open to being wrong.

I remember in my thirties, I would always want to have the last word. The thought of being wrong would make me defensive. But as I hit 40, I realized that my need to always be right was hindering my growth.

It made me realize that being open to being wrong allows us to learn and grow.

Successful people in their forties understand this. They know that admitting they’re wrong doesn’t make them weak – it shows that they’re open-minded and willing to learn. So, if you’re still trapped in the need to always be right, it might be time to let that go.

7 phrases narcissists use when they want to quietly shatter your confidence7 phrases narcissists use when they want to quietly shatter your confidence

7) Living in the past

It’s easy to get caught up in what has been. The past can hold us captive with its ‘what ifs’ and ‘could haves’. But as we hit our forties, we begin to understand the wisdom in leaving the past where it belongs – behind us.

Psychologist Sigmund Freud once said, “We are never so defenseless against suffering as when we love.” It’s a gentle reminder that clinging to past experiences, especially those that caused pain, only prolongs our suffering.

Successful people realize this by the time they hit 40. They learn to let go of the past and focus on the present and future. Because it’s what we do now that shapes our tomorrow.

Final reflections

Our journey through life is a continuous path of learning and growth. As we age, we naturally evolve, shedding old habits and adopting new perspectives.

The process of growing older, especially when we hit the milestone of 40, brings with it a certain wisdom. We begin to outgrow things that no longer serve us and start embracing practices that encourage growth and fulfillment.

These seven things that successful people outgrow by the time they hit 40 are merely signposts on this journey. They remind us that change is not only inevitable but also necessary for personal development.

So, whether you’ve already hit this milestone or you’re on your way there, remember to keep growing, keep learning, and most importantly, keep evolving.

Because it’s not just about the destination; it’s about enjoying the journey and becoming the best version of yourself along the way.

Leave a Reply