If someone says “I can’t even”, you might think they’re just a little flustered. If someone constantly talks about their possessions, you may think they’re just proud.
But you know what? It’s not always that straightforward.
The beauty of language is that it often reveals more about us than we realize. And sometimes, the seemingly harmless phrases we use can point to a less-than-stellar character.
Let’s take a dive into the shallow end of the conversation pool. In this article, I’ll be sharing 8 phrases that, when used excessively, can indicate a superficial mindset.
Stay tuned if you want to get better at spotting the shallow waters in your everyday chats. As they say, forewarned is forearmed!
1) “I can’t even”
We’ve all heard this one a million times.
“I can’t even” – a phrase that’s become synonymous with frustration, disbelief, or just plain annoyance. But when it’s trotted out for every minor inconvenience, it hints at a lack of depth.
Why? Because the user often fails to articulate what exactly they “can’t even” with. It’s an easy way out, a crutch used to avoid further explanation or introspection. They’re not engaging in the complexities of the situation or their emotions – they’re just skimming the surface.
Next time someone drops the “I can’t even”, take note. Are they evading a deeper conversation? If it happens too often, you might be dealing with a shallow communicator.
2) “It’s all about who you know”
Now, this one takes me back.
A few years ago, I met someone at a networking event who seemed to have a knack for name-dropping. Every conversation was peppered with “Oh, I know so-and-so” or “I was just talking to what’s-their-name the other day”.
At first, it seemed impressive. But over time, I realized that it was their go-to conversational tactic. They were more interested in flaunting their connections than engaging in meaningful conversation.
“It’s all about who you know” became their mantra – a phrase used to justify their lack of effort in cultivating depth in relationships. Their focus was on quantity over quality.
But here’s the thing: while connections can open doors, they’re no substitute for character or substance. So if you spot someone constantly leaning on this phrase, they might be swimming in the shallow end.
3) “Money can’t buy happiness”
“Money can’t buy happiness” – a phrase often used to downplay the importance of financial wealth. But here’s the kicker: research shows that money does, in fact, contribute to happiness but only up to a point.
When this phrase is used excessively, it can be a red flag for superficiality. It’s often thrown around by those who prioritize material possessions over personal growth or meaningful relationships.
They hide behind this cliché to justify their focus on money and status, neglecting the deeper values that truly lead to fulfillment.
So while it’s true that money isn’t everything, if someone is repeatedly using this phrase as a shield, they might be lacking depth in their outlook on life.
4) “Whatever”
“Whatever” – a word that’s synonymous with indifference and detachment. Just one word, but it speaks volumes about a person’s depth, or lack thereof.
When used excessively, “whatever” reveals a lack of interest in engaging with the world around them. It’s a dismissive response, a way to avoid diving deeper into a conversation or expressing genuine feelings.
This phrase is a common go-to for those who prefer to keep things surface-level, avoiding the effort and vulnerability that comes with emotional engagement or thoughtful discussion.
And if you find someone responding with “whatever” a little too often, chances are they might be more comfortable in the shallow end of the conversational pool.
5) “I only hang out with winners”
Now, this one is a classic. “I only hang out with winners” – a phrase I’ve heard more times than I care to count.
When I was younger, I met someone who would often use this phrase with a sense of pride. It took me a while to realize that this was their way of saying they only associate with people who can benefit them, rather than forming relationships based on mutual respect and shared values.
In essence, the phrase became a mask to hide a shallow perspective that valued success and image over depth and authenticity.
In my experience, when someone frequently uses this phrase, it’s often a sign that they’re more focused on surface-level appearances than on building genuine connections.
6) “I’m just keeping it real”
“I’m just keeping it real” – a phrase often used as a badge of honor. It sounds refreshingly honest at first glance, right? But here’s where things get interesting.
When used excessively, this phrase can become a smokescreen for shallowness. It’s often used by those who prefer to express unfiltered opinions without considering the feelings or perspectives of others.
Ironically, “keeping it real” can sometimes mean keeping it shallow. It becomes an excuse to avoid engaging in empathetic or thoughtful communication.
So if someone is overusing this phrase under the guise of authenticity, they might be sailing in shallow waters, unwilling to dive deeper into the sea of empathy and understanding.
7) “You only live once”
“You only live once” or as it’s famously known, YOLO. This phrase has become a rallying cry for living life to the fullest.
But when repeated too often, it can signal a preference for instant gratification over long-term fulfillment. People using this phrase may be more interested in chasing fleeting pleasures and surface-level experiences than cultivating depth and personal growth.
In essence, an over-reliance on YOLO might indicate a lack of depth, suggesting that the person is more interested in skimming the surface of life than diving deep into its many layers.
So if you frequently hear this phrase from someone, it might be a sign they’re more suited to the shallow end of life’s pool.
8) “It doesn’t matter”
“It doesn’t matter” – a phrase that can be the ultimate indicator of a shallow perspective.
This phrase is often used to dismiss things of importance, whether it’s someone’s feelings, a challenging situation or even personal values. It’s a quick escape route from diving into deeper thoughts, emotions or conversations.
If you hear someone frequently using “it doesn’t matter”, be aware. It’s often a sign that this person is avoiding the depths of understanding and empathy, preferring to stay in the shallow waters of indifference.
Wrapping up
By now, you’ve probably realized that language is more than just a medium of communication. It’s a mirror that reflects our character, our perspectives, and yes, even our depth.
Understanding these 8 phrases can help you navigate the shallow waters of everyday conversation. But remember, we’re all on a journey, and people can change. So rather than using this knowledge to judge or label others, consider it as a tool for deeper understanding.
After all, the essence of communication isn’t just about speaking or listening. It’s about connecting, empathizing, and diving beneath the surface. So next time you converse, dare to dive a little deeper. You might be surprised by what you discover beneath the surface.
As the renowned psychoanalyst Carl Jung once said, “The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.”
